All posts by Teri

Fish and Dishing—Girls’ Night In

Girls night in AWine A
One of my favorite occasions is when my girlfriends join me for a girls-only night in.

Sure, it’s fun going out with the girls, but nothing beats a laid-back night with my dearest girlfriends, dishing and bantering in the comfort of my home.

I recently hosted a girls-only dinner party, and at the request of my BFF, I served her fave—fried fish on the barbie.

Fish C

When hosting any kind of home cooked dinner, I like to keep it super simple. That way, I get to enjoy my party and my friends. Who wants to run around serving people all night? Not me. I much prefer to throw a few simple things together, grill something up, and then kick back and enjoy.

So here is my go-to girls’ night in carte de jour: Chips and dip, my crunch salad, fish on the barbie with a side of wild rice, and a happy ending of cheese and chocolate for dessert.

Fish E

And a plethora of wine.

When it’s just us girls, chips and dip are all we really need to get us prepped for the main event. A little dark russet potato chip scooped up with some onion dip.

Chips & Dip 1

Oh, and did I mention lots of red and white wine?

Then I follow up with “The Crunch,” my chopped concoction of celery, red, yellow and orange peppers, edamame, and cherry tomatoes, topped with crumbled blue cheese and bacon.

Crunch 1

While my friends are chowing down on The Crunch, I grill up some whole fish slathered on the inside with my homemade basil herb paste, throw together a side of wild rice, some more wine, and voila! Girls’ night in.

Fish D

And now for the happy ending.  An impressive looking cheese display.

Cheese A

On this particular night, I chose a wheel of brie, smoked gouda, a goat cheese with garlic and herbs, and havarti. Then I piled the cheese onto a pedestal plate adorned with thyme, assorted nuts, and sea salt caramels, wedding-cake style.

And of course, some more wine.

The Crunch
1 red, 1 orange, 1 yellow pepper, cut into small chunks
10 stalks of celery cut into small chunks
1 cup edamame
1 cup cherry tomatoes sliced in half (I like to use organic red, yellow and orange)
Mix the veggies together and add some salt, pepper and garlic powder
Serve with your favorite dressing, or top each serving with crispy bacon and fresh blue cheese.

Have leftovers? Mix them in with some tuna fish for a delicious and healthy lunch the next day!

Basil Herb Paste
4 garlic cloves crushed
2 cups fresh basil leaves
1/2 teaspoon sea salt
1/2 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
1/2 teaspoon Italian seasoning
Juice of 1 small lemon
1/4 cup olive oil
Add garlic, basil, salt, pepper, oregano and lemon juice in a food processor or blender. Pulse until well blended. Gradually add oil, pulsing as you blend. Taste the paste as you go along. You may need more of something depending upon your personal taste. Freeze the paste in small plastic containers.

Definition of Marketing

First-date-2

The definition of marketing is the action or business of promoting and selling products or services, including market research and advertising.

I like to describe marketing as a process by which users can learn about and obtain information regarding the end product or service.

Brand management, product pitching, and content messaging are also essential marketing tools.

But when I was recently asked to write an article clarifying the difference between marketing, advertising, public relations, branding, telemarketing, and strategic planning, I had a difficult time cogently explaining the distinction between all of them.

So below is my example of the marketing process, using a hypothesis many of you parents out there can relate to:

End Product
Single daughter

Target Marketing
You’re the mother of the single daughter and on the lookout for an eligible bachelor for her.

Advertising
You’re introduced to the mother of a single son at a party and you say, “My daughter is a successful lawyer.”

Telemarketing
The next day you call the mother of the bachelor and say “Let’s set up my daughter, who is a successful lawyer, with your son.”

Marketing Research
The son goes on the internet to see what he can find out about the daughter.

Brand Awareness
The daughter and the son go on a date set up by their mothers, and the son says “I hear you’re a successful lawyer.”

Direct Marketing
The daughter replies to the son, “Yes, I am a successful lawyer.”

Public Relations
The daughter gives the son corporate material about her law firm for him to take home.

Word of Mouth Prospecting
The son confides to the daughter that he is having tax issues, and she says “We have a successful lawyer at my firm who specializes in tax law.”

Sales Representative
The date between the daughter and son goes well, but she gets the impression that he isn’t interested in her on a romantic level, so she says, “I have a friend who might be perfect for you.”

Loyalty Program
The daughter’s friend and the son are now in a relationship, so the son sends flowers to the daughter to thank her for the setup.

Technical Support
The son has decided that he wants to break up with the daughter’s friend, so he calls the daughter for advice.

Product Recognition
The son levels with the daughter that he has stronger feelings for her than he realized.

Inbound Marketing
The son asks the daughter out for a romantic dinner.

Message Strategy
The daughter buys a new dress and has her hair and makeup done for the date.

Content Messaging
The daughter goes out of her way to impress and engage the son, making sure she makes it clear to him that she’s interested.

Call to Action
The son and daughter have a phantasmagorical date and the son offers to make dinner for her at his apartment the next night.

Guerrilla Tactic
The daughter goes to the son’s apartment for dinner wearing a little black dress and Louboutin heels.

Lead Nurturing
The daughter and the son begin an exclusive relationship.

Brand Loyalty
The son falls madly in love with the daughter.

Viral Marketing
The couple gets engaged and the daughter posts it on Instagram.

End User
The son marries the daughter.

Let Them Eat Cheese—for Dessert

Cheese tower
I love, love, love cheese. But serving cheese before dinner can oftentimes kill everyone’s appetite.

So I like to change it up and serve my cheese after dinner. It’s the perfect way for your guests to appreciate it in smaller portions, with a more mindful and enlightened purpose.

There is no better way to finish off your opened bottles of wine after dinner than with a nibble here and there of cheese.  And offer up some dessert wines for an even better experience.

Cheese makes a superb contrast to overly sugary desserts, making it the perfect alternative, offering just a hint of sweetness to finish off your meal. There’s nothing quite like the complex flavors in cheese to end a meal. I enjoy and crave it as much as sugar.

Honey, jam, chutney, mostarda, fresh or dried fruit, nuts, prunes stewed in port wine, crusty French or dark bread, and homemade panforte will further enhance and beautify your cheese platter.

Most cheese belongs to one of three basic categories: soft, firm, or blue. For a well-rounded variety, you should choose one from each group.

For me, a trio of cheese is the perfect ending to a night of entertaining. You don’t need to overload the plate with a ton of cheese—three samplings should be sufficient. I don’t know why, but in the world of cheese, a three-cheese offering is usually what’s served up: a creamy, a hard and of course, a blue.

Unless you want to make a cheese statement, like building a cheese work of art. Then you should go for it—and add all the cheese your heart desires. I happen to love this three-cheese wanna be wedding cake. It’s super simple to create and will definitely impress.

Cheese Platter Idea

Some category recommendations:

Soft: Brie, Brillat-Savarin, Camembert, Constant Bliss, Epoisses by Berthaut, Stinking Bishop

Firm: Cheddar, Comté, Double Gloucester, Gouda, Saxon Shires

Blue: Cremificato Verde Capra, Gorgonzola Dolce, Stilton, Valdeón, Cambozola

Need further cheese clarification?

SOFT
Brie: My favorite brie is St. André from the coast of France and is lavish and tasty enough to take center stage on your cheese plate.
st_andre
It is a pasteurized cow’s milk cheese, covered with a satiny, edible rind, although I usually eat around it to better enjoy the deliciously rich, buttery, and silky, salty center.

Brillat-Savarin: This decadent triple cream cheese from Normandy is perfect for dessert. The mushroom and hazelnut flavor combined with its buttercream texture make it one of the silkiest triple creams you will ever taste. Serve with crusty, French bread, or drizzle a tiny bit of honey over it for a standout flavor.

Camembert: This creamy cheese has an earthy, woody taste, with a hint of mushroom and nutty overtones. It has a buttery flavor with a soft, yellow interior and a thin, edible white rind.

Constant Bliss: This dream cheese reminds me of kettle corn: sweet and buttery, with a mild hint of saltiness. At the finish, there is an almost citrusy grapefruit flavor to it.

Epoisses by Berthaut: Made in a tiny town in the Burgundy region of France, Epoisses by Berthaut is one of the great cheeses of the world. But it might also be one of the stinkiest. It’s so pungent that it is banned on public transportation in France—a country remarkably tolerant of its strong cheese aromas. But don’t let the smell turn you away because it’s rich, creamy interior and edible reddish-brown coating is so worth it.

Stinking Bishop: Made from pasteurized cow’s milk, dating back to the Cistercian monks who once settled in Dymock  Gloucestershire, in the south west of England where this cheese is made. Suitable for vegetarians, it is a spectacular cheese experience and when served at room temperature, it will dramatically run across the entire plate, so give it plenty of room.

FIRM
Cheddar: The older the cheddar, the better the cheese as far as I’m concerned. My favorite is Cabot’s clothbound cheddar.
Cheddar
It has a wonderfully crumbly texture and nutty aroma, and the flavor is deeply savory and slightly tangy with a caramel sweetness to the finish.

Comté: This creamy, nutty-tasting French version of Gruyere absolutely deserves a spot on your cheese platter. It has an earthy flavor and a delightful texture.

Double Gloucester: Rich, buttery Double Gloucester is crafted with extra cream for a mild yet flavorful cheese, with notes of nuttiness, citrus, and hints of onion. The full-cream used to make Double Gloucester gives it a rich, buttery taste and flaky texture.

Gouda: As long as you find a Gouda that’s aged for longer than two years, you’ll revel in the sweet, caramel taste and slight crunchiness of the cheese.

Saxon Shires: A wonderfully flavorful layered cheese, Saxon Shires is also known as “Five Counties Cheese” because of the variety of cheeses that make up its five delicious layers.
saxonshire
The texture actually changes piece by piece, for a unique taste experience in every bite. The five cheeses are Double Gloucester, Caerphilly, Cheshire, Leicester, and Cheddar. This cheese has a dramatic appearance and an especially pleasing flavor. If you’re a fan of any of these British classics, this is definitely worth a try.

BLUE
Cambozola: A mild and triple creamy delight with just a hint of blue veining.
Cambozola
Think Gorgonzola crossed with Camembert, which makes it the perfect choice for those who are intimidated by the intense blues.

Cremificato Verde Di Capra: This Italian cheese is light and lemony and perfect for blue beginners. It’s very dense, almost like fudge, yet creamy. There is only a hint of salt and blue bite.

Gorgonzola Dolce: Almost spreadable, with a consistency of vanilla ice cream, Gorgonzola Dolce is soft and creamy with a hint of tang and sweet to it. Its bright white interior is laced with streaks of blue, giving it an impressive appearance to match its incredible flavor.

Stilton: Also known as the “King of English Cheeses,” the Blue Stilton is a semi-soft, creamy and crumbly cheese that gets tastier with age. Stingingly sharp and salty, the balance of these two traits are incredibly harmonious and satisfying.

Valdeón: This bold, salty and sharp blue is from Spain. You know it’s the real deal because it comes wrapped in sycamore maple leaves. Be forewarned that this cheese is in-your-face and not for cheese wimps.

For an enjoyable, unforgettable and tasty combination of both firm and blue, try the layered combo of Stilton and Double Gloucester, called Huntsman.

Huntsman: This layered dream cheese is made from two British standards. Double Gloucester, a mellow, tangy, and delicious double cream cheese and Stilton, the richly-veined, smooth yet creamy blue whose flavor is distinctive and surprisingly soft.

Huntsman cheese

The beautifully layered presentation of these two classics feature artistic layers of the orange-hued Double Gloucester enveloping the Blue Stilton and makes a most stunning impression on your cheese tray.

Here are some recipes I found along the way to add even more dimension to your first-class cheese plate:

Rosemary Raisin Pecan Crispy Bread
Rosemary Raisen pecan crispy bread
1 cup flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon Salt
1 cup buttermilk
1/8 cup brown sugar
1/8 cup honey
1/2 cup raisins
1/4 cup chopped pecans
1/4 cup roasted pumpkin seeds
1/8 cup sesame seeds
1/8 cup flax seed, ground
1 teaspoon chopped fresh rosemary
Preheat oven to 350° degrees. Mix together the flour, baking soda, and salt in a mixing bowl.  Then combine the buttermilk, brown sugar, and honey and mix it well.  Then combine the raisins, pecans, pumpkin seeds, sesame seeds, flax seed and rosemary and stir until blended. Grease an 8×4 bread loaf pan and pour the batter into it. Bake for about 35 minutes, or until golden and springy to the touch. Remove from the pan, place on a wire rack and cool. The bread needs to be very cool before slicing it, so you may want to put it in the freezer for a few minutes. Reduce the heat in the oven to 300 degrees. Once the bread is cool, slice it as thin as possible, and place them in a single layer on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake them for 15 minutes, then turn them over for another 10 minutes or until crispy and golden brown. Makes about 4 dozen crackers.

Panforte
Panforte
5½ oz. shelled pistachios
5½ oz. blanched almonds
6 oz. dried figs, quartered
3½oz. mixed peel
1 teaspoon pumpkin spice
2 tablespoons cocoa powder, sifted
1oz. plain flour
1oz. butter
5½ oz. honey
5½oz soft brown sugar sifted
Confectioner’s sugar, to serve
Preheat the oven to 300 degrees. Grease an 8-inch square cake pan and then line the base with parchment paper. Combine the pistachios, almonds, figs and mixed peel in a mixing bowl. Sift the pumpkin spice, cocoa and flour over the mixture and stir well to combine all the dry ingredients. Then melt the butter, honey, and brown sugar together in a saucepan over medium heat. Stir until the mixture is combined well and just starts to boil. Pour the mixture on top of the dry ingredients, and mix well. Transfer all ingredients to the cake pan and make sure it is level by pressing it down with the back of a spoon. Bake in the oven for approximately 45 minutes, or until it is bubbling slightly. Remove the pan from the oven and cool completely, before removing from the pan. Dust panforte with confectioner’s sugar, and slice.

Dried Fruit Mostarda
mostarda
8 oz. dried apricots, quartered
4 oz. dried cherries, halved
4 oz. dried figs or prunes, quartered
1/2 cup sugar
3 tablespoons Dijon mustard
2 tablespoons brown mustard seeds
2 tablespoons canola oil
1 teaspoon cayenne
Kosher salt, to taste
Place the dried fruit in a saucepan, and cover, just barely, with water or sweet white wine. Bring the ingredients to a boil over medium-high heat; occasionally stirring, and until the apricots and cherries are plumped and the liquid is reduced, about 30-40 minutes. Let cool.

BFF or Frenemy? When to Call It Quits

Best friends
I lost touch with my first best friend when I moved cities at age fourteen. The sudden loss of my then BFF broke my heart and I still think back on the devotion and love we shared and then lost, and sometimes wonder if our friendship would have lasted the test of time.

Since then, many besties have come and gone, for one reason or another. The old adage that we can’t choose our family but we can choose our friends is only true so long as we make the right choice.

And even though I’ve tried to choose my friends carefully, I have over the years developed less and less tolerance for those whom I once thought I picked well.

Making and keeping a BFF takes perseverance and there has to be mutual affection and respect for one another. An unwritten code of empathy, kindness, harmony, solidarity, support, and compassion combined with friendship etiquette is essential to a long-term alliance.

Anyone who has a BFF gets what I’m saying here.

Friendship etiquette is something that ensures the growth and tranquility essential for a healthy and reciprocally beneficial relationship. Friendship etiquette also means that there exists between two compadres an understanding, loyalty, and acceptance when there is not a shared like or interest in something or someone. You silently agree to stand behind and up for your BFF because that’s what a good friend does. You have their back whether you agree with them or not—in good times and especially in bad.

Additionally, friends don’t become your frenemy because your life might happen to be better than theirs at some moment in time. Friends take pride in the progress and success of their BFFs.

An actual friend will revel in your successes and knows when you’re in trouble. And they do what it takes to combat and control their possible jealousies and inner demons because we all have our insecurities.

True friends understand that even though they are BFF’s their lives are divergent and separate from each other. And they recognize that only through give-and-take respect can they secure an unforgettable and life-long attachment.

If you’ve ever had the honor of having a true BFF, it’s fairly easy to name the qualities you expect in a close friendship. And you go out of your way to be a legitimate and honest friend.

But is your BFF really for forever? The following questions should give you the answers you’re looking for.

Are they genuinely happy when something good happens to you?

Do they listen to your stories without changing the subject to something about them?

Do they give you a break when you’re clearly off your game, knowing that everyone has a bad day?

Do they cancel their plans to be with you in your hour of need?

Do they check in on you when the weather’s bad or just because?

Do they feel your sadness when something bad happens to you?

Do they accept your friends?

Do they say the negative things they feel about you to your face, and say only positive things about you behind your back?

If you’ve been a faithful friend or have a loyal sidekick, the answer to all of these questions should be yes. If not, maybe your BFF is not who you thought they were.

And jealousy is the quickest way to destroy a friendship. Let’s be honest, there will always be a friend out there with a better life than yours—a more successful job, a more luxurious home, in better shape, with a closer significant other. And maybe they’re more beautiful, handsome, or spontaneous.

But you say you love them, right? You want them to be happy, healthy, and prosperous, correct?

The wannabe BFFs say they love you, but the authentic BFF lives it. Because your friendship is worth safekeeping, and they know it’s the real deal and that a BFF once found, is irreplaceable.

Keep in mind that your BFF will always include others in their lives, which doesn’t mean that they stop being your best friend. A BFF needs to be confident enough to give their friendship shared freedom.

You’re friends for a reason. You chose each other because the two of you have something you don’t find often enough, if at all. You mutually share things like consideration, trust, empathy, support, and you love spending time with them. A BFF is a gift that can’t be measured like material goods.

Being a BFF means being truly ecstatic about your friends’ success and happiness even if you’re not up to the same speed. In every BFF, there is an element of responsibility to care about what your friend needs and take the lead sometimes. Your BFF is always on your mind, and you don’t play games.

It takes two to make a BF—there is no such thing as a one-sided friendship. A bona fide BFF is one of the best things that can happen to us. They listen to us, do things with us, and bring out the best in us. They make us better people, share new experiences, make us laugh, and are always there with broad shoulders for us to cry on in times of trouble. A BFF is considerate and your problems are their problems.

If your BFF is not like this, then, take a closer look at your friendship. Do they lack empathy and/or consideration of your feelings? Have they said and done things that have hurt you or caused offense? And when you try to explain to them that you are terribly hurt by what they’ve said or done, do they still play the victim?

If you’re always overlooking the bad behavior or demands of your supposed BFF, and/or walking on eggshells when you’re around them, it’s probably time to say goodbye.

As hard as that might be, take the energy and caring you’ve been wasting on your frenemy and find yourself the BFF you deserve.

alone-on-a-bench