First & Second Date Questions

I am very happily married, but if I were in search of a soul mate, I would definitely ask the questions below, spread out evenly over date #1 and date #2.  They aren’t in any particular order, and I would personally jump right in with the deep water questions, but you may prefer to wade around in the shallow end.

Are you pro-choice or pro-life? (Definitely a deep water question, and could be a deal breaker.)

Who did you vote for in the last election and why? (Before Trump I  thought: You don’t have to agree with each other, but mutual respect on this issue is desirable. But after Trump? This would be a deal breaker for me. )

Do you snore? (I would personally ask this question on Date #1.)

What did you do on your last day off? (Be concerned if the answer to this one is that the person waited in line for 30 hours to buy some new product on its release date.)

Are you jealous or possessive in relationships? (My experience with possessive and jealous people is that they get jealous over things that might happen, things that didn’t happen but could have happened, and things that haven’t happened but will probably happen. Toxic, toxic, toxic.)

How long was your longest romantic relationship? (Helpful to know if there are any long term possibilities.)

How long was your most recent romantic relationship? (Ditto re my note to the question above.)

Do you have any phobias, and if so, what are they? (Having recently blog posted about phobias, this would be one of my date #1 questions as well.)

What is your all-time favorite book and why? (The importance of this question is not the what but the why.)

Who is your hero? (If the answer is snoop dogg, I would delve deeper.)

Does religion play an important role in your life? (This is a great way to get the “what religion are you” question asked without actually asking.)

Who hates you and why? (This is one of my fave questions.)

How many times a week do you call your mother or father? (If the answer is 10-12 times a day, know up front that the family will be in control.)

How is your relationship with both of your parents? (My very wise grandmother told me years ago, to carefully observe how a man treats his mother because he will in all probability treat his wife the same way.)

Have you ever been arrested?  (Not enough people ask this question.)

If the answer is yes to the above question, the obvious follow up would be:

Were you convicted? (Call me naïve, but a yes to this question might also be a deal breaker.)

Do I remind you of anyone else you know? (If the answer to this question is a recent ex, run.)

Do you have any concerning diseases? (If the answer to this question is long and involves anything communicable, run run.)

Are you now, or have you ever been married? (Date 1. Duh.)

Do you gamble? (A question not asked enough.)

Who is your least favorite relative and why? (The answer to this question could be extremely foreboding.)

What is your favorite television show? (“Dating Naked” would be a red flag for me.)

Do you blame your parents for any issues that you have? (If ever answering this question, just say no.)

What do you do for a living?  (I leave it to you to determine what careers are acceptable.)

The question above makes for the perfect segue below:

Do you spend more than you earn or earn more than you spend? (I like to think that wealth is determined by the quality of one’s experiences, not one’s material assets. Just saying.)

Good luck and happy dating.

5 thoughts on “First & Second Date Questions

  1. Always insightful.I look to you not only as a best friend ( you are )best friends may not finish a sentence but months or years later can finish (this is us like it or not (I like it) I’m happy you are happy!

    1. My dear friend Peter, Happiness is a relative word, but I am finally at peace with stuff. Or almost at peace anyway. xoxo

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